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Journey

Still Waiting | One Weird Week

We continue to wait for the results of my MRI and CT Scan. The past week and a half have had their fair share of ups and downs. It’s an emotional roller coaster at times. One day it feels like nothing has even happened and the next it feels like the world is crashing in on us. For the most part, we remain positive and trust everything will work out. Tuesday I am suppose to get my results. My doctor is back from holidays and I meet with him in the afternoon so hopefully we will hear something. In the midst of all the waiting, a lot of weird, crazy things are happening. People I haven’t spoken to in a real long time are calling me and it is so neat to catch up with people from my past. Remember, there’s a bigger picture we don’t always see. To top off all the weirdness, my wife has found my biological father. Yes, you heard me correctly, my biological father. It still hasn’t sunk in. She called me early Friday morning to tell me the news as I was helping her dad do some work. I had a good cry and carried on. My mind is still racing and hasn’t fully processed her statement – “I found your biological father.” I will write more about this in the next day or so, but for now let’s just say my mind and heart are blown. Please continue to pray for us, think about us, write or text us. We sure do appreciate it! Anyways, until we cross paths again. Remember, God is still God and God is still good!

Sean

Journey

In A Room Full Of Strangers

The waiting room was already packed with people as I walked through the doors. All eyes were on me for a brief second and then they returned to their smartphones, newspapers and magazines. There was a tension in the air. I would imagine fueled by fear, concern and the unknown. So many stories all in one room. I took my number and found my seat. Thoughts were racing through my mind as I stared at the TV. What am I doing here? Why are all these people here? How long will it take for my number to be called? Number 51 I hear being called. Number 51? That’s me. I get up from my seat and head over to the nurses desk to sign in. I give the nurse the information she requires and return to my seat. I can’t help stop thinking about what everyone is here for and what they must be thinking? Did someone just find out they were diagnosed with cancer? Is the lady in the pink shirt here for a follow up? What about that guy in the ball cap, why is he here? Suddenly I hear, Mr. Sabourin? Is there a Mr. Sean Sabourin? I stand up and make my way over to the 79 year old volunteer who will walk me to my CT scan. He was a happy old man. He shared with me how he had be volunteering at the hospital for seven years as we walked towards the CT department. He wished me luck I as entered into the waiting room and turned around and told me that he was on his way to pick up a 91 year old and bring him back here. As he walked away, I couldn’t help but wonder what his story was? Why was he here? Why did he make a decision to volunteer at the hospital all those years ago? I waited for a few short minutes and then it was my turn to prepare. I got on my gown and headed into the room. It was time.

Journey

Overwhelming

For the most part, today was a good day. I spent some time with a friend out on the waters fishing. It was good to get out and try and get my mind off of things. We talked about many different topics and sometimes we didn’t talk at all. It was good just being in the moment. I catch myself drifting at times. Thinking about the possibilities of the next few steps and then thinking that this is all still a dream. I don’t think it has truly set in yet. I think when I meet with my doctor and we talk about the plan of action it will become more real.

Later in the day my mind started to think about how amazing it has been to receive countless texts, Facebook messages and phone calls. It is overwhelming to say the least. I know our family is being cared for through all the encouragement we have received.. I spoke with a friend last night who is battling brain cancer. It was great talking with him and at the end of our conversation we prayed for one another. It was a special moment. He prayed with such honesty and sincerity. It was a real encouragement to have him pray for me and I hope in some small way I was able to encourage him.

I just want to say thank you to everyone who has gone out of their way to send me or Jamie a note of encouragement. It may not seem much to you, but to us it is huge. So THANK YOU! Your words have power! They are a source of encouragement and strength in this season of life. So please know you are making a difference in our lives. Remember, no matter what He is still good!

Sean

Journey

Waiting Can Be Hard

How many of you struggle with waiting? I know I do. Here are some fascinating facts about how we spend the days of our lives.

99,117 hours: spent at work.
136 days: women spend getting ready
23,214 hours: spent washing clothes.
115 days: spent laughing.
653 hours: spent waiting for trains
6 months: how long we end up waiting in line.
20 weeks: spent being on hold.
11 years: spent sitting in front of the television.

Crazy! Now don’t ask me how someone came up with these numbers, the reality is everyone has to wait. Right now I am still waiting on getting my MRI results back. It has been somewhat difficult. You allow yourself to think negatively and then you snap out of it only to find yourself thinking the worse again. Ultimately, I know it will all work out, but waiting can be hard. Today I got my cancer clinic appointment, but again, I have to wait. The appointment is set for August 23. Next week I have my CT scan and hopefully that will be it until I see my doctor. One of the issues we face when it comes to waiting is our attitudes. When I am in the line up at the grocery store or at the traffic light my attitude isn’t always the greatest. When I am waiting for answers I can have the propensity of having an impatient attitude. I want all that to change. I want to become more level headed when it comes to things. I want to have a big picture attitude. Knowing that no matter how long I have to wait, everything is going to work out. As I write this post a Bible passage comes to mind…

2 Corinthians 4:17(NLT)

For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever!


Journey

MRI

I had my MRI today. It was the first one of my life. I was a little nervous at first as I didn’t know what to expect. The big round tube they stick you in isn’t that big and during the MRI it is quite loud. It took about 30 minutes and now I have to wait for the results. A MRI ( Magnetic Resonance Imaging )is a noninvasive medical test that helps physicians diagnose and treat medical conditions. MRI uses a powerful magnetic field, radio frequency pulses and a computer to produce detailed pictures of organs, soft tissues, bone and virtually all other internal body structures. My doctor ordered one to see if the tumor in my colon has spread or if it is isolated. I feel God’s peace and favor through this journey especially because I am told my MRI happened quite quickly.

My family and I feel very supported at this time. Many people have called, texted, or have sent encouraging messages which mean a lot to us. We continue to pray for healing and that whatever happens during this journey, God would be glorified. I was thinking yesterday about the past few months I had been preaching at church about how those who have placed their faith and trust in Jesus Christ have been bought. The life you now lead is not your own, you have been purchased by Christ. It encouraged me to think about that and remind myself and God that I have been bought. He owns me. It makes me feel a lot better knowing He is in control rather than me. No matter what happens, He is still good!

For those who are wondering, the cancer I have been diagnosed with is colon cancer. FYI. Thanks for all your comments, prayers and words of encouragement. It means a lot!

Sean